Successful Marriage

Why “Communication” Won’t Save Your Marriage

When you ask just about any couple for advice about how to succeed in marriage, their first response is usually, “It’s all about communication.  You can’t expect your partner to read your mind!”  While this advice is fine–I mean, it’s definitely not going to hurt your marriage–research has shown in the past few decades that… Continue reading Why “Communication” Won’t Save Your Marriage

Successful Marriage

Does Premarital Counseling Belong on Your Wedding Checklist?

  GoodTherapy.org Blog June 16, 2015 By Lori Hollander LCSW-C, BCD Planning the wedding felt overwhelming for Megan. With her family living far away and her fiancé uninterested in the details, she was essentially left alone to plan the most important day of her life.When her best friend Steph became engaged, Megan was ecstatic. They… Continue reading Does Premarital Counseling Belong on Your Wedding Checklist?

Successful Marriage

Breaking the Pursue-Withdraw Pattern

Interviewed by Kyle Benson The pursue-withdraw pattern is an extremely common cause of divorce. If left unresolved, it will continue into a second marriage and subsequent intimate relationships. As Dr. Gottman explains in Why Marriages Succeed or Fail, “This classical marital impasse is all too common—a wife seeking emotional connection from a withdrawn husband.” How… Continue reading Breaking the Pursue-Withdraw Pattern

Successful Marriage

The Truth About Expectations In Relationships

By Dr. John Gottman Many marital therapists tell couples to expect less. If you lower your expectations, the argument goes, then you won’t be disappointed by your partner. This advice is wrong. Donald Baucom, psychology professor at the University of North Carolina, studied marital expectations for a decade. He found that people get what they… Continue reading The Truth About Expectations In Relationships